Humans have a thing where an elf sits on the shelf of their house and reports their offspring’s misdeeds to the elf that brings gifts to the offspring on Christmas.
Clearly, this would never work for cats. For one thing, cats are never naughty. For another, any spying elves would find themselves in the litterbox in short order.
That’s why in our house, instead of having an elf on our shelf, we have a mouse in the house.
Wednesday…
Pierre: Is this thing supposed to be hiding? Stripes are camouflage for me, not a mouse wearing a red scarf.
Thursday…
Pierre: Hey! That’s my bed! What are you doing… oh, it’s YOU again.
Today…
Newton: Oh, so THAT is what Pierre has been talking about all week?
Newton: Report on my naughtiness at your peril! And be sure to tell your friends that an elf won’t work, either.
Newton: Mouse? No, I don’t think I saw one here. Did you check the refrigerator with the cheese?




































