Newton Archives - Page 77 of 138

Newton’s Emporium Idea

Newton: So Ashton, I heard that you were worried about the chicken supply.

Ashton: Don’t remind me. It makes me feel faint just thinking about it.

Newton: Did you see that Miss Susan from Life with Dogs and Cats told us in our comments that “Scientists now believe that dinosaurs didn’t completely disappear; they’re still with us in a different form: birds. So here’s a thought for you: Chickens are dinosaurs.”

Ashton: I did, but if we’re running out…

Newton: Hey, do you know what that means? Instead of chickens at the emporium, we can serve dinosaurs!

Ashton: I don’t think you’re understanding the issue here. And wait… Who said I was going to take you up on your offer to buy into my chicken emporium, anyhow? I see what you did there. No deal, buster!

If you missed them, catch up on all of our chicken capers.

New Beds

Pierre: Hey, there was more than packing peanuts in the mystery box that arrived yesterday!

Newton: What is this thing? I think this might be what that whiff of dog.

Pierre: Things. What are these things. I don’t smell any dogs, and I think they’re beds. They’re soft under my paws.

Pierre: Quick, while it’s on the sofa, I’ll try it out. Aaaaaaaaaaaaah. Yes, definitely a bed.

Newton: Okay, I’ll try it, then. Hmm….. not too bad. I might sleep here if it was the last bed in the house. Even if I don’t trust it not to have had a previous dog in it.

Newton: But when it comes down to it, I really prefer my tried and true bed instead.

What’s in the Mystery Box?

Newton: Hey, Pierre, wake up, there’s a new mystery box here!

Pierre: What is it? It smells… funny. A little like a dog?

Newton: Who would ship us a dog? Everyone knows that there are no dogs here. Or dog food.

Newton: Oh, check it out. Someone sent us packing peanuts! I love these things!

Pierre: I love how light they are. This one flew all the way over here on its own. No one saw me whack it across the floor, did they?

Newton: Hey, bring that back. These are all mine!

Pierre: I don’t think so. It’s not *your* slobber on this packing peanut, Newton!

Important!
Please always supervise your kitties when there are packing peanuts loose in the house, and always make sure that you gather all of them after unpacking a box. As you can see, some cats find them irresistible. While some packing peanuts are made of biodegradable materials, others are made of Styrofoam and can lead to intestinal blockage if eaten.