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Surprise Package

Ashton: My friend Sage told me she was sending me a surprise package, but she wouldn’t tell me what was in it. I have had to wait for DAYS for it to travel in the mail, but it’s here!

Box addressed to AshtonAshton: OMC, it’s chicks! Except…. what happened to them? They aren’t moving. Did they get motion sickness from being in the mail?

Ashton checks out the box contentsNewton: That doesn’t look too good. Are you sure Sage sent you live chicks?

Ashton: These don’t smell right. I know what chicken smells like, and this isn’t it.

Newton: Are you sure? You’ve never smelled chickens this small. Maybe they smell different when they’re small.

Ashton. No. My chicks have been catnapped!

Newton watches Ashton examine her chicks

If you missed them, catch up on all of Ashton’s chicken capers.

St. Catrick’s Day Cupcake

We told you last year about the St. Catrick’s Day traditional licking of the icing. It’s time to celebrate again!

Ashton: Whoa, you’re starting without me?

Newton and PIerre get a head start on the licking of the icingNewton: Well you didn’t expect us to wait, did you? If we wanted for you, we would never get a turn.

Ashton: You would so! Maybe.

Ashton moves in on cupcakeAshton: But now it’s my turn!

Ashton wrinkles her nose as she eats cupcake icingAshton: Hey, it dumped over.

Newton: And your teeth wouldn’t have anything to do with that?

Pierre: Use your tongue for the icing, not your teeth, Ash. We’ve been over this before.

The cupcake is dumped over from all of the attentionNewton: Your tongue, like this.  * SLURP *

Ashton: Easy with the cooties there, Newt!

Three cats and one cupcake, what could go wrong?Newton: You’re hardly one to tell anycat to go easy. That isn’t exactly a dainty, ladycatlike bite you’re taking.

Ashton: Who said anything about being ladylike? I have to get my share while I can.

Not a ladylike nibble at allAshton: If I can just get it out of this paper stuff… there it goes. 

Ashton removes cupcake from linerAshton: Now I can really get my teeth into it! 

Ashton takes big bites of cupcakeAshton: Where’d it all go? Isn’t there any more? 

Ashton eyes the crumbsAshton: If you’ll excuse me, I need a nap now.

Ashton eats a grain-free, low-calorie diet, and this is an unusual treat because of the holiday. She was supposed to share it with Newton and Pierre, not eat the whole cupcake herself. We do not recommend feeding your cat cupcakes.

Chicken Preservation In Action

Ashton: Hey, there’s an egg here. Is this part of how we are going to save the chickens?

Newton: That’s not a chicken egg. Can’t you smell the catnip in it? Girls are so strange.

Ashton: I don’t do catnip, that’s your thing. I do chicken.

Newton: That’s not exactly a secret, Ashton.

Ashton and Newton with the catnip eggNewton: Did you hear that the head peep found chickens at Global Pet Expo this week?

Ashton: She did? Really?

Newton: Really. People are keeping them in their back yards. Maybe that’s why you thought we were running out. You weren’t looking the right place.

Chickens in coopAshton: Why would people hide chickens in their back yards? Don’t they know I need them for my chicken emporium?

Newton: I don’t think they’re hiding the from you.

Ashton: Why else would they be hiding them there, then?

Chickens in coopNewton: They’re keeping them as pets.

Ashton: That doesn’t make sense. You don’t taste your pets.

Newton: They aren’t tasting them. They’re taking care of them. There was even a chicken there in a wheelchair.

Chicken in a wheelchairAshton: Well, the wheelchair will make it easier to catch, at least. How fast do you think it can go? I might have to start working out.

Newton: Ash! That’s not what people want you do to with their pet chickens.

Ashton: But if that’s where the chickens are, that’s where I’ll go so I have enough for my chicken emporium.

Newton: So the dinosaur emporium is really dead?

Newton looks over his floofAshton: As dead as the dinosaurs, Newt.

If you missed them, catch up on all of our chicken capers.

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