Newton Archives - Page 61 of 138

If You Don’t Talk to Your Kittens about Catnip, Who Will?

Newton: Catnip Anonymous asked me for help. I’m supposed to make a public service announcement about the dangers of using too much catnip.

Let’s get arranged for this. Stay right there, little sardine. Not too far away. I want to still be able to smell you.

Okay, I’m ready to get started….

* CLEARS THROAT * So hello, everyone, my name is Newton, and I’m here today to talk to you about catnip.

Wait, it just moved. I’m sure it did. Did you see it move, too?

Never mind the the public service announcement about catnip. I can’t resist this any more. Just… umm… don’t do catnip, kittens. Send it to me instead.

Chicken Real Estate

Ashton: What’s with the hat, Newt?

Newton: I’m wearing my hat because today I’m real estate cat.

Ashton: Are you going out to sell real estate to support your catnip habit or something?

Newton: That’s not a bad idea! But no… I wanted to talk to you about where you’re going to put your chicken emporium.

Ashton: What about it?

Newton: You know how business is all about location, location, location?

Ashton: I’ve heard that.

Newton? I found the perfect location! We just have to convince the current owners to sell.

If you missed them, catch up on all of our chicken capers.

Photo credit: Flickr, Brent Moore

Maybe It’s a Chicken

Newton: What’s this? It looks a little like a chicken, not really. This is why the head peep doesn’t do arts and crafts.

Ashton: A chicken! Where’d that come from?

Newton: Do you really think this looks like a chicken?

Ashton: Did you make it? I didn’t mean to hurt you feelings.

Newton: No, I didn’t make it.

Ashton: You don’t mind if I eat it, then?

Newton: I wouldn’t eat it, but if you’re that hungry…

Ashton: I don’t see anything edible in here.

Ashton: What, did you think I was going to get my head stuck in there like I did last week? I’m not a silly kitten, I learned my lesson.

Ashton: Who are you looking at, bird-brain?

Did you see the rest of our chicken capers? If not, catch up on our adventures.

That’s a Funny Spider!

Pierre: That’s not like the spiders that have been sneaking in to avoid the rain recently.

Pierre: It doesn’t smell like a spider, either.

Newton: Oh, a spider! Tasty!

Pierre: I’m not so sure it’s a spider.

Newton: Really? Let me get a closer look.

Pierre: Watch your nose! What if it bites?

Newton: * SNIFF * I see what you mean. It doesn’t smell like a spider.

Pierre: Come here, little spider. Or whatever you are.

Newton: Hey, aren’t you going to share?

Pierre: Maybe. But for now, I’m going to get a close look. Really, really close.

If You Don’t Talk to Your Kittens about Catnip, Who Will?

Chicken Real Estate

Maybe It’s a Chicken

That’s a Funny Spider!

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